Fine. (Exhales) What more must my girlfriend tell you for you to finally understand and accept that you are now through, finished, over, done, geëindigd (Dutch), fini (French), beendet (German), rifinito (Italian), terminado (Portuguese).
She left you because:
1. She doesn't like you anymore.
2. She never loved you in the first place.
3. You have molds in your ear.
4. You're a doorknob! (Everyone gets a turn)
5. You pretend you're possessed by the Holy Spirit.
6. You brush your teeth without the use of water.
7. You have sex with your own cousin.
8. You're below average.
9. The doctor in University Health Service said you needed a psychiatrist.
10. My girlfriend's mother is freaked out by you.
11. You have illusions/delusions.
12. You're weird.
13. You're dense.
14. You'd sleep with anyone/anything even highschoolers.
15. You're a slob.
16. You have no sense of fashion.
17. You have delusions that your uncle who happens to be a decent pastor ogles at you.
18. The only thing you eat are instant noodles.
19. You'd pass for a man.
20. You're schizophrenic.
These are just 20 things that are reason enough for her to leave you! If it's still not enough, read this:
She's now with me and she loves me to pieces.
Got it? Still a no? I do have something for you, try taking any of these three times a day:
- Fluanxol (anti-psychotic)
- Leponex (Anti Schizoprenia)
- Solian (Anti Shizophrenia)